FRIDAY WRAP: shiny glass cliffs, AI Jesus, dual class shares enable sexual harassment, and Florida still sucks

Introduction

LIVE from your ESG walk-in pantry, it’s a Business Pants Friday Show here at August 4th Lane Studios, featuring some of your favorites: Ari the data queen, Jessie the money whisperer, and Analyst Hole Matt Moscardi. On today’s weekly wrap up: shiny glass cliffs, AI Jesus, dual class shares enable sexual harassment, and Florida still sucks

Story of the Week (DR):

1. Adidas pledges to donate €110mn to charity from Yeezy sale

1. The German company terminated its highly profitable agreement with rapper West — now known as Ye — in October last year after he made antisemitic remarks.

2. In its second-quarter results on Thursday, Adidas said the first sale of its outstanding Yeezy shoes, generated €400mn in revenue and €150mn in operating profit.

3. The company had previously promised to donate a “significant amount” of the proceeds to charity. It has made an initial donation of €10mn already with a provision for another €100mn.

4. CEO Bjørn Gulden said the donations would be made to organisations fighting racism and antisemitism.

5. FFA: only 2/16 POC; Jing Ulrich (6%), a banker from JPMorgan who serves on zero board committees and attended only 6/9 meetings last year AND Jackie Joyner-Kersee (0%), who also serves on zero board committees

2. Former Disney executives return as advisers to chief Bob Iger

1. Tom Staggs and Kevin Mayer to consult on legacy TV business

2. Disney’s board recently extended chief executive Bob Iger’s contract for another two years, raising questions about succession planning at the company

3. Disney has hired two former executives who were seen as potential successors to Bob Iger during his first stint as the company’s chief executive, according to people familiar with the situation.

3. Glass Cliff stuff MM DR

1. A replacement for Anthony Fauci, the top U.S. infectious disease expert and frequent face on TV during the COVID pandemic, has been named: Dr. Jeanne Marrazzo will become director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases in the fall.

2. Jetstar CEO Stephanie Tully apologises 'to everyone we've let down over our 20-year history' as she issues plea to Aussies

3. BT Hinges Turnaround on First Female CEO: Allison Kirkby

4. SEC Adopts New Rules on Cybersecurity Disclosure for Public Companies JS

1. In summary, the final rule requires: (i) Form 8-K disclosure of material cybersecurity incidents within four (4) business days of the company’s determination that the cybersecurity incident is material; (ii) new annual disclosures in Form 10-K regarding the company’s cybersecurity risk management and strategy, including with respect to the company’s processes for managing cybersecurity threats and whether risks from cybersecurity threats have materially affected the company; and (iii) new annual disclosures in Form 10-K regarding the company’s cybersecurity governance, including with respect to oversight by the board and management

Goodliest of the Week (AB):

1. Taylor Swift Reportedly Gave Her Entire Touring Company $55 Million In Bonuses JS

1. gifted truckers on her tour $100,000 each ahead of her concert stop in Santa Clara over the weekend

2. ‘AI Jesus’ shows a fascinating refashioning of the biblical prophet for the modern era MM DR

3. The Women's World Cup Was TV's Most-Watched Show Amid Record-Breaking Viewership

1. The U.S. women’s national team game against the Netherlands was last week’s most-watched show on television as it broke records for the highest-ever English language viewership of a group stage match in women’s FIFA World Cup history.

Assholiest of the Week (MM):

1. Vince MacMahon

2. Ed Blum DR JS MM

1. Conservative activist behind US affirmative action cases sues venture capital fund

2. This is fucking NEXT LEVEL assholery

3. Target of the suit: Fearless Fund's Fearless Strivers Grant Contest, which awards Black women who own small businesses $20,000 in grants, digital tools to help them grow their businesses and mentorship opportunities provided in conjunction with Mastercard

1. A privately held venture fund founded by black women that focuses on investing in other black women is now being sued for “discriminating on the basis of race” by someone who doesn’t have to invest with them, look at them, deal with them?  

2. Why not sue the KKK for only allowing whites?  Or sue a health care company for discriminating against oil companies because it isn’t one?

3. The grant making foundation was funded in part by WalMart (“Fearless Foundation - The Fearless Foundation received a grant from Walmart in support of its inaugural Fearless Venture Capital Week—a week of free financial education and empowerment sessions. Attendees took part in informative workshops and discussions around building wealth within the Black family and the importance of bridging the generational wealth gap. Fearless Foundation also used a portion of the grant to support a business pitch competition during the event and HBCU scholarships.”)

1. WHY NOT SUE WALMART?  THEY HAVE THE SAME FUCKING PROGRAM!

4. Free Float Analytics alert:

3. Antiwoke rhetoric

1. Bud Light

1. Bud Light Sales Down 10% After Right-Wing Boycott Over Campaign With Transgender Influencer

2. Also… Bud Light owner AB InBev beats forecasts in quarter dominated by boycott

2. Vivek

1. LOOK HOW MUCH I HATE THE GLOBALISTS: Two years ago, WEF tried to throw false bait by naming me a "Young Global Leader" when I explicitly rejected their ridiculous award. They repeatedly failed to remove my name despite escalating demands.

2. JUST NOT WHEN THEY GIVE ME MONEY: Paul & Daisy Soros Foundation scholar, 2011 - he started Roivant with another Soros scholar recipient!

3. Even the antiwoke hate themselves?

1. Even Republicans are getting tired of nonstop political crusades against ‘woke’ companies

4. Las Vegas

1. So the solution to “how do we cope with living in hell” (Hottest month ever: July sets all-time Las Vegas heat record) is… spending 48m on useless holes???

2. The Boring Company will dig a 68-mile tunnel network under Las Vegas

Exhausting-est of the Week (JS):

1. Telecoms giant BT appoints first female CEO in its history. MM

1. IT GETS MORE EXHAUSTING… the rest of the headline: Her priority will be clearing out almost 55,000 staff

2. Not surprisingly…Free Float Analytics tells me that BT’s board is only 27% female

3. But what did shock me is that a female, Isabel Frances Hudson, has the most influence on the board- 16%

4. I wasn’t able to trace it to nepotism…

5. What the hell Isabel??? You haven’t felt the need to advocate for female leadership at BT over the past 7 years???!

6. Cutting expenses starts with with new CEO, Allison Kirkby, who will make a salary of 1.1M pounds compared to her predecessor’s 3.08M pounds

2. Wisconsin’s Dairy Industry Relies on Undocumented Immigrants, but the State Won’t Let Them Legally Drive DR JS

1. America’s Dairyland, Wisconsin’s Clark County, relies on a labor force that they know is largely undocumented to corral cows, milk them and clear manure

2. WI makes it nearly impossible for workers to have lives outside the farm without breaking the law- undocumented immigrants can own and register cars and trucks, but they aren’t allowed to drive them. Those who drive anyway are pulled over again and again and again, and issued tickets that eat away at their wages.

3. The workers, many from remote, impoverished communities in Latin America, are grateful for the jobs. And yet they feel trapped.

4. “You can’t call Uber because there isn’t any. You can’t take the bus because there aren’t any,” The closest grocery store is 25 miles away

5. These industries cannot operate without undocumented immigrants: farming, construction, production

3. AP Psychology is now ‘effectively banned’ in Florida schools following the state’s ‘Don’t Say Gay’ law

1. The College Board said Florida’s Dpt of Ed rules restricting the teaching of gender identity issues “effectively banned” AP Psych, a course that the non-profit administers

2. The board said in a statement: “To be clear, any AP Psychology course taught in Florida will violate either Florida law or college requirements. Therefore, we advise Florida districts not to offer AP Psychology until Florida reverses their decision and allows parents and students to choose to take the full course.”

3. Under the group’s policy, censored curriculum does not qualify for the AP designation.

4. So now high schoolers in entire states are losing out on the opportunity to learn science-backed schools of thought!!!

Who Won the Week?

1. DR: Me? Will we finally see board-level cybersecurity disclosure in proxy statements?

2. AB: 

3. MM: Taylor Swift’s truck drivers

4. JS: Cybersecurity experts that will be snatched up by boards

Predictions

1. DR: Zuck has elevated cholesterol numbers and is declared pre-diabetic; becomes pasty and thin again by December; Priscilla sells fighting cage, donates proceeds to the Chan Zuckerberg Initiative

1. Mark Zuckerberg reveals he’s eating 4,000 calories a day after announcing his gigantic McDonald’s order on Threads:  “20 nuggets, a quarter pounder, large fries, Oreo McFlurry, apple pie, and maybe some side cheeseburgers for later?”

2. AB: 

3. MM: The first trip to Venus fails

4. JS: Philip Jansen is BT Group’s boomerang CEO. They’ll bring him back once she’s fired 55,000 staff members